August, 1999

Jesus said to him, "Thomas, because you have seen Me, you have believed. Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed."

(This is a meditation I wrote to God in February 1997 while reading this verse in the gospel of John)

Lord, even though I can’t see what may lie ahead; even though I may not understand where you are leading me or how you are getting me there to the place where you want me to be -- to the place, I firmly believe, you have already prepared for me to be -- even though I can’t see, help me to believe. Help me to trust in you completely and learn to obediently take these steps of faith waiting for the fulfillment and revelation of your complete plan for my future.

Lead me and guide me. Help me to believe and trust in you even though I can’t see which way to go. Teach me during this time of preparation, and help me to spend the time wisely being made ready for the work which you have called me to. Help me to learn the lessons I need to learn as I wait upon your divine direction. Prepare me, not only intellectually and practically -- ministering to me in those areas where I need to learn -- but also prepare me spiritually. Help me to learn how to trust in you completely.

Teach me to pray as you would have me pray. Help me to learn how to come into your presence: help me learn how to listen to that still, small voice of your Spirit. Remove my own desires and objectives and replace them with your desires and objectives. Give me victory over wrong desires. Help me to learn how not to follow my own will, but to follow yours. May every message be from your own throne; may every word I write for the Bible studies be inspired and directed by your Holy Spirit. Remove me and move my will out of the way. Help me to learn how to listen to your instruction and follow in total obedience. Help me not to become anxious or impatient. Show me clearly the way in which I must go. I will strive to follow you in total obedience to your will. Help me not to doubt or question or wonder. Even though I can’t see, help me to believe. For I know you have nothing but good for me all the days of my life.

Dave